Anti-Wolf Activist Investigated for Bragging About Running Over Wolves

If you drive long enough through the mountains and valleys of the western United States, eventually you're going to hit and kill a wild animal with your car. » 9/23/14 5:08am 9/23/14 5:08am

Utah Man Armed with Sword Catches Polygamous Ninjas Breaking Into Home

There are some things that make Utah unique—like floating in the Great Salt Lake, or setting a new land speed record at Bonneville, or maybe just getting attacked in your own home by a pair of armed polygamous women dressed as ninjas. » 9/22/14 1:04pm 9/22/14 1:04pm

Satan Hailed With Grape Juice, Big Dildo in Oklahoma Black Mass

It was an epic battle between crucifixes and deified baked goods vs. grape juice and dildos in Oklahoma City on Sunday night—and while it's unclear which side won in the fight over the "black mass", we know for certain that (as always happens when alleged adults engage in such fights) dignity and enlightenment once… » 9/22/14 11:59am 9/22/14 11:59am

Peyton Manning's Pizza Businesses are Mysteriously Booming

Colorado-based small business owner Peyton Manning—who also dabbles in professional athletics with often mixed results—says that thanks largely to unspecified "recent law changes" his 25 Papa John's pizza franchises scattered across the state are all doing rather well. » 9/19/14 3:43pm 9/19/14 3:43pm

Arizona Man Killed in Horrifying Wood Chipper Accident

It's difficult to imagine a more brutal death than being sucked through an industrial wood chipper—in fact, it's probably best for your sanity and general disposition to not imagine such things at all. » 9/19/14 3:26pm 9/19/14 3:26pm

More Problems Found at Leaky New Mexico Nuclear Waste Dump

The New Mexico dump which holds the nation's dirtiest laundry from nearly 70 years of nuclear weapons production was supposed to be a an accident-proof underground vault that would entomb radioactive waste in a 2,000-foot thick layer of salt for at least 10,000 years. » 9/19/14 1:40pm 9/19/14 1:40pm

Western Cinema: "The Terror of Tiny Town" and Family Bonding

Authors Note: I've always liked westerns—especially the weirder and more obscure ones. This is the first in a series of occasional posts about some of my personal favorites. » 9/18/14 4:17pm 9/18/14 4:17pm

Fast, Intense Wildfire Leaves Northern California Town in Ruins

This has already been a bad year for wildfires along much of the drought-parched West Coast—but "bad" doesn't even begin to describe the catastrophe that struck the small northern California lumber town of Weed this week after a quarter of the town burned to the ground in the space of a few hours. » 9/18/14 1:19pm 9/18/14 1:19pm

Iconic Bike That Launched a Million Mid-Life Crises Up for Auction

There will always be a part of me that has a soft spot for the movie "Easy Rider," even though if we're being honest it really isn't a very good film. » 9/17/14 3:53pm 9/17/14 3:53pm

Arizona GOP Vice Chair: Sterilize Women Who Receive Medicaid

The Arizona Republican Party's second-in-command resigned over the weekend after he called for the forced sterilization of women as a requirement for receiving public aid. » 9/16/14 4:50am 9/16/14 4:50am

​"Black Mass" Sold Out as Satanic Fever Grips Oklahoma City

Wagons are being circled, tizzies are being thrown and children are being thought of in Oklahoma City, as the state's religious leaders are urging the faithful to pray like they've never prayed before in preparation for the most eagerly-anticipated religious event in the history of the city—one which the Catholic… » 9/15/14 12:40pm 9/15/14 12:40pm

​Hero Bat Dies Trying to Save Oregon Forest from Jammin' Guitarist

A noble but ultimately doomed bat gave its last full measure of devotion last week as it swooped in and bit a guitarist in the neck while he was pickin' and grinnin' with some friends in the Oregon woods. » 9/15/14 12:45am 9/15/14 12:45am

Large, Hungry Bears Hindering Crews Battling Yosemite Wildfire

It seems that the cruel hand of fate really wants the forests and meadows of Yosemite National Park to become a charred ruin, and is using every means at its disposal to try and make that happen. » 9/12/14 2:08pm 9/12/14 2:08pm

Denver Deputy Suspended for Beating Inmate Who Mocked Taekwondo Skills

In a year that, by any measure, hasn't exactly been slopping over with shining examples of American law enforcement—the profoundly troubled Denver Sheriff's Department may be the least brilliant of them all. » 9/11/14 5:50pm 9/11/14 5:50pm

Montana Barley Crop Ruined, Beer About to Get More Expensive

Nobody is calling it "beerpocalypsemageddon" or anything idiotic like that quite yet, and I'm certainly not implying that it's time to panic and start hoarding cases of beer in a deep, razor-wire covered pit in the backyard*—but you should probably know that beer could get a lot more expensive next year. » 9/10/14 3:30pm 9/10/14 3:30pm

Dramatic Photos Capture Yosemite National Park Wildfire

Authorities say that a wildfire in Yosemite National Park that prompted the helicopter evacuation of dozens of people from the top of Half Dome is finally slowing down thanks to some cooler, more humid weather. » 9/09/14 4:30pm 9/09/14 4:30pm

The Grand Canyon Squirrel Kicking Case Has Gone Cold

It looks like the two mysterious pudknockers caught on a YouTube video kicking a squirrel off the rim of the Grand Canyon in Arizona might have gotten away with it. » 9/09/14 3:38pm 9/09/14 3:38pm